HAPPINESS
DISCOVERED
Your guidebook to happiness
by
Udo Stadtsbuchler
Copyright © 2009 Udo Stadtsbuchler
Published by Udo Stadtsbuchler at Smashwords, Inc.
All rights reserved
Without limiting the rights under the copyright reserved under above, no part of this application may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted in any for or by any means (electronic, mechanical, by photocopying, recording or otherwise) without prior written permission of the copyright owner and the publisher of the book.
Cover Design: Dmitriy Konyushenko, www.nitrocovers.com
Happiness Discovered is also available in print at Amazon.com and Create Space.com. To find out more go to the author’s blog http://udo-mindmatters.blogspot.com
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This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
Happiness Discovered is dedicated
to my beloved wife Elsie, who is my inspiration, my happiness and my reason for being.
Udo Stadtsbuchler, Marbella, Spain, January 2010
Prologue
A brief and incomplete history of happiness research
Definitions of happiness
Biology of happiness
The brain, creator of happiness / Thoughts / Diet / Exercise / Environment / Physiology
Philosophy of happiness
Hedonism / Desire Theory / Objective List Theory / Authentic Happiness / Ethics
Psychology of happiness
Is happiness our birthright? / What is happiness? / Why happiness is important
Obstacles to happiness
What prevents us from the pursuit of happiness? / Anger / Fear / Guilt / Excuses / Declining happiness in families / Materialism and Consumerism / Drug consumption / Paradox of autonomy, freedom and choice / Skeptics and happiness / Law of attraction
Happiness creation
Common perception of happiness / What makes people happy? Why happiness? / Are you happy? / Circle of happiness
Happy people
Happiness triggers / Happiness boosters / Education / Meaningful work or activity / Work and productivity / Social activity / Sex / Romantic love / Gender / Children / Wealth and financial security / Can everybody be happy?
Health and happiness
Personality and happiness
Happiness sources
Religion and Spirituality
Feelings and emotions
Happiness, a favorable balance of emotions / Concepts, reality and feelings / Needs and wants / Maslow's Pyramid of Needs
Mind
How to get what you want / Five positive psychological exercises / Find out what you want / Be self-confident / Be prepared to change / Be active and keep busy / Socialize / Plan and organize ahead / Stop worrying / Eliminate negative thoughts / Emphasize the positive and be an optimist / Live in the present / Be true to yourself
Plan your happiness
Plan of action / No need to win them all / Harmonize your goals / Turn off the TV / Accept yourself / Make others feel important / When in doubt guess positive / Aim for consent / Old age, so what? Pay attention, you may have what you want / Be true to your word / The dangers of “what if” / It's not the event / Enjoy what you have / Be precise in your thoughts / Who is to blame? / Make your work enjoyable / Sleep well / Achieve a goal every day / Adapt / Be positive, be an optimist / Events are temporary / The world is not its media picture / Society and happiness / The choice is yours / Have fun / Be guided by your conscience / How do you know that you are progressing toward happiness
Plan your life
What do you want? / Have purpose / Know what makes you happy and what makes you sad / Goal setting / What are the benefits of not achieving your goal? / How can you get this benefit by achieving the goal? / Strategy / Tactic / Don't let others set your goal / How will you know when you have achieved your goal? Your goals are your priority / How you can motivate yourself
The best part of your life is yet to come
Practice happiness / Positive thinking and happiness / Laughter / Humor and happiness
Gross National Happiness (GNH)
Can governments contribute to happiness?
Provide welfare and social security / Provide political and personal freedom / Solve the drug problem / War on terrorism / Happy Planet Index
Daily exercises of the mind
Affirmations / Visualizations / Automatic negative thoughts / Reframing, meaning making, meaning changing
Change
Acceptance / Realize your potential / Behavioral changes / Think yourself happy / Your plan of action
On Reflection
References
About the author and this book
QUOTATIONS
U.S. Declaration of Independence:
We hold these truths to be self-evident that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their creator, with certain unalienable rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness.
Abd Er-Rahman 111 of Spain (960 C.E.):
“I have now reigned about 50 years in victory or peace, beloved by my subjects, dreaded by my enemies, and respected by my allies. Riches and honours, power and pleasure have waited on my call, nor does any earthly blessing appear to have been wanting to my felicity. In this situation I have diligently numbered the days of pure and genuine happiness which have fallen to my lot. They amount to fourteen.”
Sri Swami Satchidananda (1914 – 2002) said:
“Your ultimate goal is to be happy. Where is that happiness? Within you. If you want to have permanent happiness, it will never come from the outside. If somebody makes you happy today, the same person can make you unhappy tomorrow. You are happiness and peace personified. Find that happiness and peace within you.”
Thomas Aquinas (1225 – 1274) presents happiness from the Christian perspective as felicity or blessed happiness, as a vision of God’s essence in the next life.
Baruch Spinoza (Dutch philosopher 1632 – 1677):
“All happiness or unhappiness solely depends upon the quality of the object to which we are attached by love.”
Immanuel Kant (German philosopher, 1724 – 1804):
“Happiness is not an ideal of reason, but of imagination.”
Benjamin Disraeli (British politician, 1804 - 1881)
“Action may not always bring happiness, but there is no happiness without action.”
John Milton (English author, 1608 - 1674)
“The mind is its own place and in itself can make heaven of hell, and hell of heaven.”
Buddhist Teachings and the Eightfold Path will lead to Nirvana, a state of everlasting happiness.
Aristotle (Greek philosopher, author, critic, 384 BC – 322 BC)
“One swallow does not make a summer, neither does make one fine day, similarly one day or brief time of happiness does not make a person entirely happy.”
Random House Unabridged Dictionary 2006
Happiness:
Quality or state of being happy
Good fortune; pleasure; contentment; joy.
Synonyms: pleasure, joy, exhilaration, bliss, contentment, delight, enjoyment, satisfaction. Happiness results from the possession or the attainment of what one considers as good. Bliss is unalloyed happiness or supreme delight.
Oxford Universal Dictionary:
Happiness:
Luck, fortune, being contented, glad, pleased; a feeling derived from being contend with one’s circumstances.
What makes happiness a mystery and why is it believed to be the most un-understood phenomenon in the world?
Why is a myth around this phenomenon and why do many people see happiness as elusive, that might happen to them or not?
Why do they not even think about it and do not ask questions such as:
What is happiness?
How does it feel to be happy?
What is the nature of happiness?
What is a happy mood like?
Why are some people happier than others?
Does a happy personality exist?
Does it depend on genetics?
Is there “someone up there” who determines who is happy and who is not?
Can one be too happy?
Are happy people more successful than unhappy people?
Can one learn to be happy?
Is it unrealistic to strive for happiness?
What are the benefits of happiness?
Why is it important to be happy?
These and more questions will be answered for you in this book. You will read about some of the most important happiness theories, the philosophy and psychology of it, and the biology of happiness; but I only touch on these subjects. If you wish to learn more details, you will find a very useful list of references at the end of the book. The purpose of Happiness Discovered is to help you, the reader, find happiness. I think it is essential to know the theory of happiness, because this understanding makes it plausible that happiness can be learned. You still need to overcome the gap between knowledge and practice, between theory and action. Happiness Discovered helps you to acquire the skills that are necessary for it, so that you can begin your journey to happiness, or to increase your happiness and to maintain it.
Enjoy your journey.
ABRIEF AND INCOMPLETE HISTORY OF HAPPINESS RESEARCH
Many philosophers and thinkers since Plato and Aristotle discussed happiness; probably every religion on earth has happiness at or near its core. But serious scientific research into individual happiness began relatively late. The first psychological study I know of is Goodwin Watson’s paper published 1930 “Happiness among Adult Students of Education.” Happiness research gained momentum only from 1957 when Alden Wessman wrote his doctoral thesis “A Psychological Inquiry into Satisfactions and Happiness.”
Many other psychologists followed, such as Angus Campbell, who 1976 suggested that being content was an important key element of happiness; 1978 Jonathan Freedman, 1984 Ruut Veenhoven, 1990 Michael Eyseneck discussed it and wrote about this subject; and 1984 as well as 1994 Ed Diener reviewed the literature on happiness research. Michael Fordyce, PhD, wrote an excellent book “Human Happiness” which inspired me to write this book. 2003 George Ortega produced the first TV show dedicated entirely to happiness. Mihaly Csikszentmihaly - arguably the brain behind positive psychology - Daniel Kahneman, Bruce Heady are other very important contributors into happiness research.
There are many more psychologists and social scientists who have published their studies - too many to mention all of them here. Martin Seligman, the author of “Authentic Happiness” established a Master Degree course on Positive (Happiness) Psychology at the University of Pennsylvania. More courses were established at other universities and, I am sure, many more universities will follow. Research in happiness in general has gained enormous momentum, and long may it last.
Mainstream medicine researching psychoneuroimmunology quite naturally had to consider the mind - body connection and many researchers (Shelley Taylor, UCLA, Geoffrey Reed, UCLA, Margaret Kemeny, UCSF, to name but a few) directed their research at this dual-function model and came up with spectacular discoveries. I will return to this very important theme in a later chapter.
Researchers looked at positive psychology and how it affects illness or wellbeing; and many more psychologists and social scientists have researched and discussed happiness as a social as well as an individual phenomenon.
In my own work as a psychotherapist I use positive psychology extensively. In fact all of my work is based on positivity and optimism. Not the blinkered optimism that negates everything that is negative, but the kind of optimism that realizes that negatives can and will occur even to the greatest optimist. But we optimists know that events do change; most certainly and much faster they will change when we actively do something about them. We react to them with positivity and with the confidence that we can master anything that life throws at us.
There are quite a few definitions of happiness, and it indeed has many meanings and as some people say, perhaps even synonyms. It certainly includes a sense of wellbeing, being in the right place, being content and full of joy. It is enjoyment of life, or satisfaction with it; a sense of security and the ability to fulfil one’s desire.
I suggest that we, as individuals, are responsible for our own happiness and that we cannot take responsibility for other people’s happiness. Just the same as we are responsible for our own actions and reactions and how we utilize our resources. I believe that we cannot build a happy life without being happy, and that we should always remember to be happy. I also suggest that happiness is not our birthright, but that it is a privilege bestowed on those of us who are prepared to work toward it.
But what is it, are there any preconditions, to be or to become happy? What are scientists’ opinions?
Is it money? Not according to Ed. Diener’s research, that suggests that once we have fulfilled our basic needs, additional income does not increase our happiness.
Is it good education? According to some research higher education or high IQ does not contribute to happiness; other studies suggest the opposite. The US Pew Research Centre Survey shows that 30% of respondents with High School education say that they are very happy; whereas 33% of those who had some college education, and 43% of those who graduated reported to be very happy.
Is it age? Contrary to common belief older people are happier on average than younger people. The US Centre for Disease Control and Prevention, 2004, found that the age group 20 - 24 years experiences sadness for an average of 3.4 days a month, whereas the group from 65 - 74 years old feels sad only for 2.3 days a month.
Is it marriage? Well, evidently it is because 43% of all married women and men report to be very happy; but only 24% unmarried women and men say the same (Source: Pew Research Centre).
There are a few more happiness triggers that are mentioned in most surveys as the most important ones and I will discuss them all in this book.
What scientific research quite clearly shows is that happiness is not a static feeling. People, who report to be happy sometimes, feel unhappy at other times, and occasionally happier than usual.
A word of warning: there is a downside to every scientific research based on questionnaires; they are more often than not desperately inaccurate. People remember feelings that they had, and memory is often very selective. Positive and optimistic people will remember past experiences more positively; negative and pessimistic people in hindsight will see only the negative aspect of that experience.
For example an optimistic, positive person will reflect on his holiday and see only the glorious sunshine, remember the wonderful cuisine and the incredible scenery. The negative pessimist will remember the one rainy day, and the one burned rasher of bacon he was once served for breakfast.
Daniel Kahneman, Nobel laureate and professor emeritus of psychology at Princeton University, demonstrated something similar with a quite unusual study involving colonoscopy. One group of students underwent the usual standard colonoscopy and another group a 60 seconds longer procedure, but during these 60 seconds, less uncomfortable procedure. Kahneman found that the “better” ending made colonoscopy much more comfortable overall in hindsight. Therefore this group was more willing to have a repeat of the procedure.
Kahneman suggests that asking people about their happiness is like asking them about the colonoscopy after it’s done. He also suggests that researchers should focus on people’s actual experiences rather than on their reflections.
One thing everyone agrees on is that happiness is a feeling; therefore the question I want to answer first is how are feelings created? You will find the answer in the following chapter Biology of Happiness.
Biological research into feelings in general started probably in the 1930s with José Delgado’s investigation into electrically stimulated pain and pleasure.
Still, until the mid 1950s brain physiology - the physical study of the brain - was rendered irrelevant medically by Freudianism. Psychoanalysis was the one and only highly regarded cure for any mental dysfunctions and behavior. This changed from the mid 1950s notably with José Delgado’s contention that one cannot understand human behavior without understanding how the brain works. He was the one who first established a map of the brain, using stereotaxic needle implants and stimulating them electronically, to determine which areas of the brain controlled what behavior.
I mention Delgado only because of his importance in the field of brain research. Unfortunately his findings misled him into writing in the Yale University Medical School Congressional Record, No. 26, vol. 118, 24. February 1974:
“The individual may think that the most important reality is his own existence; but this is only his own personal point of view. This lacks historical perspective. Man does not have the right to develop his own mind. This kind of liberal orientation has great appeal. We must electronically control the brain. Someday armies and generals will be controlled by electric stimulation of the brain.”
Gordon Thomas in his book “Journey into Madness: The True Story of Secret CIA Mind Control and Medical Abuse” (Bantam Books, 1989) relates how “... behaviourists at ORD (Office of Research and Development, later CIA, Central Intelligence Agency) shared Dr. Delgado’s views that the day must come when the technique would be perfected for not making not only animals but humans respond to electrically transmitted signals ... “
Needless to say that this is not at all my sentiment, nor do I believe that any happiness researcher will subscribe to this view. Researches into brain functions have given us many invaluable and positive insights. However, the previous example quite clearly demonstrates that also serious researchers can come to conclusions which I regard as science gone mad.
The brain, creator of happiness
Happiness is created deep down in our brain; in and around the limbic part of our brain. In the mid 1950s researchers implanted electrodes into the brains of monkeys and found the areas in which they could stimulate feelings of anger, fear and pleasure. This was the time when brain research really began. Later the same brain stimulation was used on humans and our pleasure centres were discovered in the limbic system, the thalamus and the cerebral cortex. In fact over 400 points were found that triggered happy feelings. Is it not interesting to know that only three of these points showed some satiation after continuous stimulation? All the others did show no satiation at all. In other words physiologically speaking we can experience happy feelings all the time and forever. This sounds great, but psychologically speaking it is unfortunately in all probability impossible. However, we can imagine that somewhen in the not too distant future there will be a device available that allows us to create our own happy feelings at the push of a button. Whether this is good or not so good is a different question.
The pharmaceutical industry has made some progress in controlling feelings. Or has it? Medication is the standard treatment for clinical depression, bipolar disorder and most other mental disorders. They have failed, however, to pin-point medication in such a way that for example depression is replaced with a feeling of wellbeing. Medication reduces all feelings, whether they are positive or negative. Medication sedates the patient; but research suggests that the unwanted feelings associated with depression remain the same, for example feelings of insecurity, helplessness, and self-loathing. In addition, the long-term effect of medication on the brain is most certainly detrimental to the overall wellbeing of the patient.
Therefore pharmaceutical drugs do not really bring about change, nor do drugs of choice like recreational drugs or alcohol. They may bring about short-term feelings of fun, pleasure, confidence and even happiness, but only as long as they are effective in our brain. Once their efficacy wears off, the pendulum swings in the opposite direction and together with physical discomfort, unhappiness sets in. This artificially induced happiness is nowhere near the real feeling, the natural feeling. The great thing is that we can induce natural happiness; we can induce it short-term, for only a fleeting moment; or long-term, just by using this book as guidance.
Dr Richard Davidson, director of the Laboratory for Affective Neuroscience, University of Wisconsin, writes that functional MRI (Magnetic Resonance Imaging) images reveal that when people are emotionally distressed - anxious, angry, depressed - the most active sites in the brain are circuitry converging on the amygdala and the right prefrontal cortex. When people are in positive moods - enthusiastic, energized, and upbeat - these sites are quiet, with the most activity happening in the orbitofrontal part, left of the prefrontal cortex. Dr. Davidson discovered a quick way to index a person’s typical mood range, by reading the baseline levels of activity in the right and left prefrontal areas. The more the ratio tilts to the right, the unhappier the person tends to be. The more it tilts to the left, the happier they are.
Researching hundreds of participants Davidson established a bell curve distribution, with most participants in the middle, experiencing a good mix of good and bad moods. The few participants who were farthest to the right of this curve were most likely to be clinically depressed, or suffered other forms of mental or anxiety disorders. To the few participants who were farthest to the left of the curve, troubling moods were relatively unknown and if these moods happened, recovery was rapidly. Davidson’s research suggests that we have a biologically determined set point for our emotional range. This could explain why people after having experienced a life changing event - for example unexpected wealth, or physical disability after an accident - about one year later have the same daily moods as before the momentous occurrence.
On a biochemical level our mood is affected as follows. The neurotransmitter dopamine, especially in the mesolimbic pathway projecting from the mid-brain to structures such as the nucleus accumbens, is involved in desire and is also related to pleasure. Neural opioid systems that make and release the brain’s own opioids become active at mu-opioid receptors. Mu-opioid neural systems are complexly interrelated with the mesolimbic dopamine system. Some neuroscientists suggest that the mu-opioid systems are even more directly linked to happiness.
More recent research suggests that another neurotransmitter, adrenaline (epinephrine), plays a greater role in happiness than serotonin, which has an important role as mood modulator.
It is important to conceptually understand that the brain actually secretes chemicals corresponding to our positive and negative thoughts. The resulting chemistry influences all our natural abilities and functions. This, in turn, determines how well we perform at whatever we do. Mind and body work together; they are intertwined, affect one another and cannot function without each other. Because of this mind - body connection, power and efficiency of our brain can be increased by consciously optimizing its chemistry.
This fact has been proven many times in particular in sports. Sportspeople live, train and perform by this principle. They know that their negative thoughts cause their brain to secrete chemicals that can immediately impair their performance. This awareness is necessary for them to be more positive when responding to their challenges. It helps them to control their emotions, change negative to positive feelings, and by doing so increase their performance.
This ability not only applies to performance in sport, but we can use the same principle, namely our control over our emotions, to successfully confront any kind of challenge life provides, whether in business, our private life, or any of our day-to-day activities. We can find courage when courage is needed; self confidence when self confidence is needed; humor and laughter when this is the best response.
Our brain receives signals from the outside world through our senses of seeing, hearing, tasting, smelling and feeling. These sensory inputs enter our nervous system in form of electrical impulses through our neurons (brain cells). At the end of the neuron, as it enters the next cell through a synapse, the electrical impulse converts into a biochemical, the neurotransmitter.
This makes our system an electrochemical nervous system. Chemical messages are re-converted into electrical impulses as they enter the next neuron. This process is repeated over and over - billions of neural fireworks within a split of a second - until all the relevant areas of the brain are covered and the brain then reacts upon the content of the message. As the messages change, the chemical response changes and our brain’s performance changes accordingly.
Our electrochemical nervous system is an alternating electrical current that creates an electromagnetic field around us. The strength and quality of this field is felt by those around us. This explains why we have “good chemistry” with people with whom we enjoy to be, and “bad chemistry” with people with whom we don’t enjoy to be. The electromagnetic field, which is created by our thoughts and feelings, is the field that either attracts or repels other people and consequently even events, which of course can and will affect our life and our happiness.
The good news is that we can increase our natural abilities and our happiness by consciously adjusting the chemistry in our brain. What affects the production and the flow of these biochemicals is the way we think, our diet, our exercises, our physiology, and our environment.
Thoughts
Any thoughts whether they are positive or negative cause the brain to secrete chemicals. These chemicals affect all natural abilities and functions. We find good examples of it in sports. Intensive positive thoughts about the outcome of a contest increase the possibility of exactly this outcome. Negative thoughts, on the other hand, prepare oneself for negative outcomes. Look at it this way: thoughts have two components, facts and feelings. Facts are the sensory inputs that we receive; our interpretation of these inputs creates the feelings. It means that stimuli, which we receive through our senses, are facts, but they are meaningless until we attach feelings and therefore meaning to them. All feelings have profound influence on our brain’s chemistry and subsequently on our performance as well as on our happiness. Adverse - negative - chemical secretions hinder our natural abilities.
However, the good news is that it is possible to exchange negative emotions for positive ones, thus increasing our natural abilities. After all, we can influence many things in our life; we can control far fewer, if any; but our thoughts are completely within our control. I will show how to do this as we proceed through this book.
Diet
Every food and drink that we consume is a chemical and interacts with the chemicals in our system. Hence our food and drink intake affects the way we feel and how we perform. This does not only apply to sports people, but to everyone. We all have observed that we feel and perform better when we are not over fed, but also not hungry. On the other hand ask anyone who has over-indulged in alcohol or rich food, how they feel and perform the following day. However, there is more and better expert advice on healthy eating available than I can provide
Therefore I restrict myself to saying that awareness of the importance of healthy eating should lead everyone to find out what’s good for them.
Exercise
Our bodies are designed to function properly with physical exertion that can remove toxins from the body. But, contrary to the early days of time, humans are no longer engaged in extensive physical activities. On the contrary, many of us are woefully out of shape and unfit. But for your body and mind to function properly, it is important to exercise to make up for the lack of physical activity that progress and civilization have brought on us.
My recommendation is to exercise up to the level of discomfort - but not beyond - which most certainly is different from individual to individual. This exercise - whether it is swimming, walking, running or anything else - will result in the production of endorphins, the feel-good chemical. In addition, exercise stimulates deep breathing, which enriches blood with oxygen. Oxygen, as we know, is not just food for your muscles but also a very important source of food for your brain. For this reason I recommend in addition to physical exercise deep breathing exercises on a regular basis.
It is for you to just find a fitness regime that suits your needs and your life style.
Environment
This is not just your surroundings and the air that you breathe. I am thinking more about the people around you. Their electromagnetic field, their thoughts and actions, can and will affect you; and sometimes, if you are not aware of it, this can have adverse results. I suggest that you should, if possible, associate only with optimistic and positive people. Their interaction with you will stimulate you positively and in turn you will stimulate them. Bear in mind that emotions can be contagious, which works positively as well as negatively. If you can, eliminate negative people from your life. Should this not be possible, undertake extra steps to stay on top: be positive, optimistic and confident.
Physiology
I think it was the great communicator and motivator Tony Robbins who coined the phrase “Motions create Emotions.” Our body language affects our emotional state, and our emotional state affects our body. We see this bi-directional effect in many aspects of our behavior. When we feel positive and confident we stand erect, chest out, chin up and possibly with a smile on our face. If we tried to think a sad thought together with this kind of body language, we would find it quite difficult. This would come much easier, almost automatically, if we turned our eyes downward, wiped that smile from our face, let our shoulders hang, and slouch. If we tried to think a happy thought now, we would find this very challenging.
Breathing is another indicator: slow, rhythmic and deep breathing enhance the internal and external image of confidence and wellbeing. Shallow and quick breathing does the opposite.
Always bear in mind that your physiology, your diet, your environment, and the way you exercise, influence your thought processes - which, in turn, determine your feelings. This should make you more observant of your behavior and, consequently, you will heighten your awareness of it. In the beginning you probably will be consciously and actively engaged in the process of improving your state of mind.
But as your actions become more regular you will soon realize that they are becoming habitual and a matter of course. You will notice that your energy and alertness have increased. You will be aware that your self-esteem and your self-confidence have increased substantially. Every morning you will look at the day ahead with positive expectancy; obstacles become challenges to be mastered with ease and confidence. You project the image of a winner … you feel a winner … you are a winner.
You are happy.
Let us presume that happiness means wellbeing, not just physical wellbeing, however important it is for us, but overall wellbeing. Being well or, more importantly, feeling well in all aspects of your life; not just being satisfied, but really feeling good - happy - about your place in the “big picture.”
You are the judge of your wellbeing; you know what’s good for you. You have your own interest at heart, and not the wellbeing of others. But should your happiness coincide with the wellbeing of others, then this is magnificent and an added bonus.
We also want to see happiness as a continuous and perhaps even lifelong feeling, and not as something that happens to you when it is triggered by some outside event or experience. This form of happiness is not going to last very long. You get used to what you had acquired or achieved that made you happy at that time. Once you are used to it, your happiness will fade away.
Bear this in mind when you read about the happiness theories and ask yourself if you can sustain your happiness by following one or the other of the theories.
Hedonism
Minimizing pain and maximizing pleasure - the core of hedonism - was advocated many, many years ago first by Aristippus of Cyrene (435 - 354 B.C.) who praised immediate sensory gratification; and he valued pleasures of the body higher than pleasures of the intellect. Dwelling on the past or thinking about the future would only create uncertainty and worries. Not to think about it, but focusing on the here and now and the enjoyment of it, creates happiness. Immediate pleasure is the ultimate goal. Even fleeting desires should be fulfilled, or the opportunity might be lost forever.
Epicurus (341 - 270 B.C.) said that our fundamental moral obligation is to maximize our experience of pleasure. He defined it in a letter to Menoeceus: “By pleasure we mean the absence of pain in the body and trouble in the soul. It is not an unbroken succession of drinking bouts and revelry, not sexual lust, not the enjoyment of fish and other delicacies of a luxurious table, which produce a pleasant life; it is sober reasoning searching out the grounds of every choice and avoidance, and banishing those beliefs through which the greatest tumults take possession of the soul.”
Therefore, contrary to wide held belief, the epicurean life style is not just sex, drugs and rock’n’roll, but it is much more refined.
Aristotle wrote in Nicomachean Ethics, 350 B.C.: “Happiness is the only thing that humans desire for its own sake. They don’t seek fortune or fame for the sake of being rich and famous, but because they believe that richness and fame will bring happiness.”
Aristotle also suggested that sensual pleasures are vulgar, and that true happiness is found by identifying one’s virtues and cultivating them.
In this context it is quite interesting to note that in ancient Greek texts the words happiness - eudaimonia - and pleasure are often used interchangeably.
There were many proponents of various forms of hedonism, for example Jeremy Bentham, 1748 - 1832, who proposed “Utilitarianism”, with its single principle: “Act so as to produce the greatest good for the greatest number.” He defined good as happiness and happiness as pleasure. One could perhaps say that utilitarianism is a more unselfish form of hedonism. On the other hand, since it is up to the individual’s definition of what is good and what stimulates pleasure, it no longer seems to be unselfish.
Hedonism and psychological egotism - the theory that we are motivated only by self interest - go hand in hand. Sigmund Freud's Pleasure Principle too suggests to maximize pleasure and to minimize pain, which puts Freud squarely into the hedonic group. However, according to his Reality Principle it is advisable to control desire and to delay gratification, if obstacles of the “real world” intervene. In his words: “... an ego thus educated has become reasonable; it no longer lets itself be governed by the pleasure principle, but obeys the reality principle, which also at bottom seeks to obtain pleasure, but pleasure which is assured through taking account of reality, even though it is pleasure postponed and diminished.”
At one end of the spectrum hedonists - who I would call Aristippean hedonists - see pleasure as the trigger to happiness and as the hook they need to experience happiness. They see the experience of pleasure as the ultimate goal. Their focus is on sensual pleasure, for example indulging in the sex, drugs, and rock ‘n’ roll life style, maximizing physical pleasures and minimizing pain and suffering.
Hedonists at the opposite end of the spectrum still follow the same principle of maximizing pleasure and minimizing pain, but they seek fulfilment in the “higher” intellectual pleasures, such as good family life, a peaceful life, knowledge, beauty, and virtue.
The difference between the opposite ends of this spectrum, and all the different shades between these ends, questions the objective meaning of the word pleasure. And we have to realize that pleasure, like all feelings, is an individual dimension of an experience. We can therefore say that pleasure is the subjective satisfaction of one´s desire. This satisfaction could be anything from the fulfilment of physical pleasure to a life dedicated to charity, and anything in between. However, many psychologists agree, and I am of the same opinion, that people who do good, do so because it gives them pleasure.
Desire Theory
Put very simply this theory says that satisfying our desires is rewarding and our reward is the fulfilment of the desire. According to Griffin, 1986, happiness means getting what you want; whereby whatever the want is, is determined by the individual who wants it. The desire theory concurs with hedonism that pleasure is preferable to pain; but whereby hedonists prefer pleasure over the fulfilment of their desire; desire theorists hold that the fulfilment of one’s desire is preferable, with the pleasure element taking second place. Therefore, hedonists value the amount of pleasure they gain, whereas the desire theory focuses on how well one’s desires are fulfilled. In other words, the better your current desires are fulfilled, the better off you are. This fulfilment of what you desire gives you pleasure and, therefore, happiness.
Some philosophers and psychologists claim that the desire theory can do better than hedonism. Let us see why and go back as far as to the ancient Greek and what they thought of happiness. They value happiness as the ultimate end and motivation behind all human activity. Plato differs from Aristotle’s view as he quite clearly states in “The Republic.” Plato suggests that the pursuit of pleasure and happiness for its own sake leads only to injustice and enslavement; consequently man becomes slave to his own desires. Here Plato clearly turns his back on hedonism.
Plato offers three categories of pleasure, necessary and unnecessary ones. For example, necessary could be the desire for basic food; unnecessary the desire for cordon bleu cuisine. The third category is the pleasure of the intellect, the pursuit of justice and philosophy.
Another view is that the pursuit of getting what we want in order to be happy is often more pleasurable than fulfilling our want, because this fulfilment in the end might not be up to our high expectations.
Obviously hedonism and desire theory have in common that both propose that pleasurable experiences make people feel good and make them happy. The formal difference is that hedonists will see pleasure itself as the hook that makes people feel good and happy; proponents of the desire theory suggest that desire satisfaction is the hook.
Objective List Theory
This is a list which consists not only of pleasurable things or those that satisfy our desire. What should be on that list depends entirely on the individual who establishes it, and what they decide will bring about happiness.
Aristotle in Nicomachean Ethics puts it this way: “We take what is self-sufficient to be that which on its own makes life worthy of choice and lacking in nothing. We think happiness to be such, and indeed the thing most of all worth choosing, not counted as just one thing among others.”
Sen, 1985, and Nussbaum, 1992, locate happiness outside of feelings and onto a list of truly valuable things in the real world. The Objective List Theory suggests that happiness is a life full of achievements such as career, health, beauty, education, love, wonderful relationship, good conscience, knowledge, prosperity and self-actualization, which all belong onto the list of this theory. This moves happiness into a position where it becomes more objectively valuable and is no longer a subjective dimension of an experience. This experience does not need to be just pleasurable or desire-satisfying for the individual, but should serve the wellbeing of many, a large group of people, a nation.
In my mind this is a difficult concept; an ideal rather than a practicality, because it gives raise to some questions that are not easily answered.
For example:
How does the individual decide what to put on his list
How does he know what it is that will serve the wellbeing of many?
Is it his intuition?
Is it what political or spiritual leaders prescribe?
Is it what he himself determines to be good for the wellbeing of others?
Would it not be arrogant, even a delusion of grandeur to believe to know best what’s good for others?
Whoever wants to answer these questions has also to bear in mind the happiness of the individual who decides what is good for the group. It is for this reason that one common objection to the list theory is that it is elitist, since individuals, who establish this list, claim that certain things on that list are good for others, even if the others don’t want them and don’t find them enjoyable or pleasure-giving. I propose that the objective list theory can only have merit if it involves a group of people who are in full agreement with the list’ contents.
Authentic Happiness
Seligman, 2003, suggests that there are three kinds of happiness:
Pleasant Life, meaning pleasures in the Hedonistic sense;
Good Life, engagement in the Desire Theory sense;
Meaningful Life, which is in contrast to the other two at least partly objective, and fits in with the Objective List theory attempting to identify what is larger and more worthwhile than the pursuit of pleasures and the fulfilment of desires.
In other words authentic happiness is about the “Full Life,” which satisfies all the criteria of happiness. Seligman says that happiness consists of positive emotions and positive activities and those positive emotions are contentment, pride, serenity, satisfaction, optimism, hope and trust.
In contrast to Daniel Kahneman, Seligman emphasizes the “remembering self” and he says “I think we are our memories more than we are the sum total of our experiences.” For him the actual experiences emphasize too much transient pleasures and displeasures. He argues that happiness is more than that, and he suggests in his book “Authentic Happiness” (2002, Schuster & Schuster N.Y.) three components of happiness, namely pleasure (creating a smiley face), engagement (involvement with family, work, romance) and meaning (using our personal strength to server some higher goal). He ranks them in order of importance, pleasure being the lowest, whereas involvement and engagement are the highest and most consequential.
My own definition of happiness is located somewhere between hedonism and desire theory; and I lean very much toward Aristotle’s “Happiness depends on ourselves.”
Ruut Veenhoven, emeritus Professor, Erasmus University, Rotterdam: “Happiness is an emotion, a mood; it is an enduring state of mind that consists of positive feelings, peace of mind and active pleasure and joy.”
Some say that happiness is pleasure and satisfied desire. However, even though satisfaction and contentment play a very important role in happiness, they should not be mistaken for it. There is more to happiness as you soon will discover.
Happiness is a subjective dimension of an experience and its individual interpretation and assessment. Many thinkers argue that happiness cannot stand alone, but that it needs one or more “hooks” on which we can hang happiness. These hooks can be love, health, wealth, accomplishments, beauty or anything that makes us feel happy. Some psychologists have tried to find one common reason that can make everyone happy; some have argued that financial security is the one; Prof Daniel Kahneman, University of Princeton, and others disagree. Kahneman argues “Standard of living has increased dramatically and happiness has increased not at all, and in some cases has diminished slightly.”
Clearly there is no single universal cause for happiness. Anyone can disagree with another person’s reason for happiness, and this disagreement can range from mild disbelief to outrage; but no-one has the monopoly to globally objective and real happiness; this concept simply does not exist, because we all experience the world around us differently. We all interpret, evaluate and assess the world around us and what makes us - individually - happy. Only we, as individuals, can judge the overall quality of our life-as-a-whole, and only we can judge if and to what degree we are happy. Only we can say what makes us happy, whether it is a wonderful and meaningful relationship, family life, good health, financial security, good friends, beauty or whatever else it may be. Even in the framework of good and bad, or right and wrong, I believe that bad and wrong is only undesirable because it diminishes the happiness of another individual or group. Right and good is only desirable because it increases the happiness of another individual or group.
If you know your reasons for being happy - the hooks - you also know how you experience and quantify this feeling. If you don’t know whether or not you are happy and if you are uncertain about what could make you happy, then you want to explore your feelings and find your triggers - the hooks - for happiness.
Anything can produce happiness; as I said before it can be drug induced or through other outside stimuli like reading or listening to music. But it can be also something that is not typically associated with happiness, such as any kind of activity that has meaning for you and that makes you happy; it could be anything from fly fishing to skydiving, from stamp collecting to horseback riding.
The difference is that short-term activities produce only short-term happiness, which is great. But it is not the kind of long-lasting happiness I discuss in this book and which is the one to strive for.
However, the fact remains that there is not one common cause for happiness - neither for short-term nor for long-term happiness. This leads us to the conclusion that happiness does not depend on outside stimuli or outside events, but on our interpretation of them.
Ethics and the pursuit of happiness
Most psychologists and philosophers would agree that ethics have to play a role in any wellbeing or happiness theory. No theory would have much credence without ethics and morality.But this begs a rather interesting question: whose ethics, whose morality? Should we adopt Immanuel Kant’s view who in his Categorical Imperative says “act only to that maxim whereby you can at the same time will that it should become a universal law?” It sounds wonderful to me, but is it doable? Or should we knowingly lower Kant’s standards?
Let me make an attempt to answer the question about ethics, even if the answer can only be somehow unsatisfactory. Ethic is moral integrity; by definition it prescribes rules and norms for human activities and shows how we ought to direct our actions. Ethics not only direct us what to do if we want to be morally good, but indeed oblige us to do good and to avoid evil. Every people, whether they live in highly developed countries, or hidden away in some unexplored rainforest, have their own morality, their own prescriptions of conduct.
Each individual is capable of establishing a code of moral standards and concepts, which they can apply to every detail of their daily activities. These various individual standards and concepts are adapted and modified to benefit the majority of the people in the group. This is how society and interpersonal relations ideally function. Even though most people don’t even consciously think about their own moral integrity we all are confronted with it very often. For example whenever we make a decision to do the “right” or the “wrong” thing; or whenever we have the choice between one or more “rights”.
Often the question arises what is the “right” thing to do and what is “wrong”. Another often relevant question is to either do the “right” thing even though it may be not legal; or to do the “wrong” thing in order not to do something illegal; or to do nothing which also could be “wrong”.
I give you two examples:
You fill in a loan application form and you notice that you do not quite fulfil one of the bank’s requirements: you decide that you are not going to exaggerate your income because you say to yourself:
Honesty is an important principle for me.
If everyone lied who could we trust?
It would be fraud and if they found out I will be prosecuted.
Your superior in your workplace is a single mother. One day she calls in sick and says that she will be off work for a few days. The following evening you see her in a restaurant together with her child and a man. You decide to take action and report her to her boss because you say to yourself:
Trust is a vitally important element in our business.
You have to consider the wellbeing of all your colleagues.
Lying about sick leave is fraud.
When you decide how you would act in these situations, how would you feel about yourself? Whatever your action would be, it is being based on your principled consciousness. All your virtues, principles and values such as righteousness, courage, fairness and kindness, define your moral DNA.
Whatever we do is based on our values and principles, which are certainly not the result of our rational thought processes, but are pure emotions. Therefore it is our feelings that define our moral integrity. Can our moral integrity present us with difficulties? Yes it can, because it may sometimes require us to sacrifice personal gain in order to do what we perceive to be the “right thing” to do.
Decisions based on our moral integrity can limit our pursuit of happiness to some degree. We are restricted by our own - adapted, modified - moral code to sacrifice at least to some degree our individual happiness for the benefit of the society in which we live. If we contravene this code, we will be punished and perhaps excluded from society; a consequence that would greatly contribute to our displeasure and unhappiness.
Consequently this means that some of us may have to forgo some of their pleasurable activities in order to stay at least reasonably happy; or to shift their effort to the pursuit of happiness to other pleasure inducing and happiness giving activities.
Another aspect is our social conscience, which describes our concern for the common good and which also assists us in our interaction with others. But when we talk about the common good, typically we mean the majority of a group of people. What happens to the minority? Think for example about a minority ethnic or religious group which might be suppressed and exploited by the majority. We may be quite happy standing by and accepting the plight of the minority, and that’s fine for our happiness.
But what about those who want to stand up for the wellbeing of the suppressed, and are quite happy to do so? We can, of course, say that if this is their hook for happiness, so be it. If these good people are then ostracised or even persecuted by the majority and, consequently, experience unhappiness, then they surely experience a dilemma. They may have to make their decision based on their principled conscience, the sum of their own moral principles, their integrity and courage, honesty and virtue. This is, of course, under the proviso that these principles are essential and are the hook for their happiness.
Is it emotionally easier for those of us who find happiness by following rules and regulations laid down by society and complying with what’s right in law and to perform one’s duty?
Perhaps it is so, because it provides us with an escape route. We could escape a moral dilemma by foregoing our principled conscience in order to comply with society’s customs, rules and regulations. A problem might arise if the state or society has imposed too many rules and regulations, thus has taken away our own personal responsibility. I strongly believe, however, that we are personally responsible for our actions, for our wellbeing, indeed for how we conduct our life. Taking away this responsibility means taking away happiness. Consequently we better take sole responsible for our own happiness.
Is happiness our birthright?
What about the idea that some people are born happy and others have to acquire it, if they can? In other words how much of happiness is due to our genes, or nature, and how much is due to our upbringing or development, or nurture? David Lykken, researcher at University of Minnesota, published a paper in 1996 asking exactly this question. He had collected data on 4000 sets of twins born between 1936 and 1955. He found that genes influence character traits such as easy going personality, sunny disposition, dealing with stress, low levels of anxiety and depression. He came to the conclusion that approximately 50% of our overall satisfaction with life comes from genetic programming. Income, marital status, religion and education contribute only 8% to it. The rest is as he says “life’s slings and arrows.” Because of this enormous influence of genes on our emotional wellbeing, Lykken suggests, we all have our set point for happiness, which is determined - much like our body weight - by genetics.
Therefore, no matter what happens to us in our life - good, bad, horrific, fabulous - we always return rather quickly to our set range. There is a significant body of research that supports Lykken’s findings. For example in 1978 a study of lottery winners found that they did not end up being happier than a control group. Also people who in accidents lost limbs bounced back to almost the same level of happiness they occupied before. Psychologists call this phenomenon “circumstances adaptation.” However, Ed Diener found that two life events knock happy people back way below their set points for a much longer period of time, loss of a spouse and loss of a job.
When Lykken published his study he concluded that “trying to be happier is as futile as trying to be taller.” He has since distanced himself from his statement and admits “I made a dumb statement in this article. It is clear that we can change our happiness levels widely - up or down.”
Needless to say I am very happy and so are probably most other happiness researchers that Lykken revised his original conclusion. Because now we can work on how we can increase or even create happiness, using the tools available to us: the power of our thoughts, making and changing meaning and our innate desire to have fun.
What is happiness?
Happiness is generated in the brain. We know that the limbic system is involved, as are the frontal lobes of the cerebral cortex. We know it because we found that damage to these brain centres can cause permanent inability to feel happiness. In the early 60s scientists implanted electrodes in monkeys’ brains and found that they could stimulate happy behavior in them. We do not know exactly the biochemical processes involved, beyond what I have described in a previous chapter.
Happiness is a state of mind, a mood, a feeling; a wonderful, worth-striving-for feeling; the be-all and end-all; the ultimate good. We can say with greatest conviction: Happiness is the purpose of our life.
Today we can produce happy moods through brain stimulation in laboratories; we can stimulate happiness by reading uplifting or funny literature, by watching movies and by listening to music, or through hypnosis. There is no difference in the quality of the feeling, whether it is drug induced – albeit very short-term - self induced, or induced by any other means.
Whatever vehicle used, people who experience happiness describe the feeling using words such as joy, jubilant, enthusiastic, elated, exhilarating, but also content, peaceful, serene, warm, cosy and calm.
One of the most important, if not the most important things that we experience in a happy mood is that our thought patterns change remarkably. We think more positively, all aspects of our life are more meaningful, events become more satisfying, harmonious, beautiful and good, and we become much more optimistic. We experience heightened self-perception, we like ourselves more and we are more confident and self-assured. We also notice that not only the big positive events in our life produce happiness, but we become more aware of and happy with the little things that we experience; a walk on the beach, kittens playing, a child’s laughter.
However, the most remarkable aspect of it is that we can induce this state of mind ourselves; we do not need drugs or other outside stimuli for it!
Why happiness is important
Happiness is really all there is. Although we possess cognitive abilities and are highly thought orientated, the quality of our lives is entirely determined by our emotions.
You can consider happiness within the framework of good and evil, or right and wrong, and you will find that wrong and evil is only undesirable, because it diminishes happiness for another individual or group. Right and good, on the other hand, is only desirable, because it increases the potential for happiness for another individual or group.
John Locke (British philosopher, 1632 - 1704) argues that goodness creates happiness and evil creates unhappiness. Accepting this idea means to accept that there can be an objective and globally acceptable definition of both good and evil. This of course cannot be the case since both good and evil are subjective perceptions of experiences or events. It may very well be that an event that many people experience as being evil creates happiness for others.
Of what value is anything except for its utility in facilitating happiness? The only reason to do anything is to create or to maintain our own happiness or happiness for other individuals or groups. Many of us forget that all values such as health, prosperity, beauty, love, peace, productivity and even ethics and justice are only means to facilitate happiness. A vast body of research shows that the happier we are the better people we become. As we become happier, we become more compassionate, more creative, more energetic, more emotionally and physically healthy, and more successful at whatever we want to successful at.
Mental health and happiness go hand in hand. Prof Seligman published a study in which 94% of severely depressed people became less depressed, 92% became happier with an average symptom relief of 50% (!) over 15 days, using exercises based on Seligman’s positive psychology.